Home Ask Dr. Kathleen® As a woman, how can I avoid settling for the wrong partner?

As a woman, how can I avoid settling for the wrong partner?

by Dr. Kathleen Hall

Anna, Dishonesty is the rotten core of so many relationships. Too many women settle to get a man. Women believe there are too many women for the number of men, and they “sell out” to get a man. Yes, it is disgusting in this day and age, but it is a reality. I know women who are doctors, lawyers, professors, and other professionals who give up their values and their truth to have a partner. Socioeconomic class is no preventative for the plague of “settling.”

Settling is when a person knowingly gives up truths that they value to keep or sustain a relationship. Please wake up and realize that you are living a lie when you are desperate for a relationship and give up the gift of you for the desires of someone else. A few signs of knowing that you are settling for an inadequate relationship are when you have conflicting core values, when your partner does not respect you or your opinion, or when the other person continually makes important decisions without your consultation.

Give yourself the gift of life. Be your fully truthful, honest, whole self in your relationship with your significant other or spouse. Life is a rich adventure of love, passion, loss, and abundance that is best when it springs from honesty. Maintaining honesty in your relationship is a spiritual practice that must be tended to like a fragile garden. Weeds can pop up overnight, and it takes extreme vigilance to protect and nurture what is most important to you. I can assure you, it is worth every moment of tending.

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